"Dance, Girl Dance"

Stop the presses!!! I just saw a film in which Ralph Bellamy actually got the girl. And he got this girl. I'm still in shock.

Maureen can stop your heart. She contains an intoxicating fire and strength. Beautiful, funny and fierce. Even in mediocre pirate movies Maureen holds her own against the bad guys. This is not a woman who gets left behind. and she proved it with some stellar roles into the '50s. Leaving aside "Miracle on 34th St", she is dazzling in "Mr Hobbs Takes a Vacation" and my longtime favorite, "The Parent Trap.

Ralph is easy to miss on the poster  

"Dance, Girl Dance" is an oddly modern title for a strange little movie. Maureen's innocent Judy starts out kind of shy and dreamy, but as a young aspiring ballerina pitted against crass burlesque queen Lucile Ball, well, Lucy doesn't stand a chance. There is an actual cat fight. Yes, you heard me right. Cat fight. On a stage. In fancy costumes. Feathers fly.

They fight over this guy I've never heard of, Louis Hayward. But he's
billed with Maureen, over Lucille, even though she has way more screen time. Hayward's Jimmy isn't around much, but he takes this rich, drunk playboy wastrel stumbling out of of a glamorous bit '30s froth, and gives him a dark, broody edge. There is a missing back story between Jimmy and his rather charmless ex-wife, which makes the end more than a little unusual.

 As a co-star Hayward is as handsome a macguffin as one could wish for, but when I wondered why he wasn't more famous, I admitted he lacked that certain spark that makes a good leading man. Although the studios did give him quite a decent number to fail in. Louis Hayward did have some good friends though. Noel Coward among then, according to Noel. Which makes having also been Ida Lupino's husband extremely practical in a beardy sort of way.

Even though it's actually not the plot, it's the O'Hara, Bellamy, Hayward triangle that intrigues me the most, Lucille must be given her fair due. Can I assume that even today's youth have at least heard of Lucy? If I am permitted to assume that the whole world loves "I Love Lucy" —as they most certainly should—I still have to remind myself that most people don't even know she did pretty well for herself as a movie star before TV. I probably watched every episode of every one of her TV shows before I caught her early studio days. Often extremely glamorous and regularly typecast as the coarse girl on the make for Mr. Moola. (Now I am thinking that I need to make a list of movie stars who made cheap and trashy birds really sing. Barbara Stanwyck is on top, no matter what you think of Bette or Joan.) Look at Lucy sitting next to poor virtuous—and starving—Maureen. She waltzes in so covered in fur that you can't tell where her ugly stole ends and her ugly little dog begins. Now see Lucy's dress in her Tiger Lily White number. You can only imagine, but I can tell you I've never seen anyone open their legs quite that far when kicking. She's raunchy perfection. And Lily nee Bubbles means well when she gets her friend a job in the show, even if Judy's "fancy" dancing is just to provoke the crowd too razz her and beg for more Lily.

And what of poor Mr Bellamy? Such a decent fellow! This guy is so good-natured that he doesn't even hold a grudge when Cary Grant steals Irene Dunne "The Awful Truth" Then takes Rosalind Russell  in "His Girl Friday". Here he spends most of the movie chasing Maureen—and really truly looking like a great catch—but of course Judy keeps flicking him aside, unaware that Steve Adams holds the power to help her be the great ballerina she yearns to be. When Judy finally figures it out she tearfully collapses into his arms. The movie ends on them kissing of course, but she's really only just met him. Steve wins, and he should. But the plot really throws you a red herring with the big fight over Jimmy.

It seems likely that the lack of the traditional girl-gets-boy happy ending can be credited to the director. I'm quite embarrassed to admit that I'd never heard of Dorothy Arzner before now. (I should go check my copy of The Celluloid Closet) Her bio on IMBD is truly astonishing. Arzner directed Clara Bow in a picture that both made Fredric March a star (if you've never seen "The Best Years of Our Lives" hop to it!) and created the first boom mike, which, as much as I like Mr. March is a contribution to film making of unfathomable significance. Then Arzner directed our beloved Katherine Hepburn with a serious clash of wills and prevailed—that may have been the last time Hepburn let anyone boss her around. Arzner was close friends with Joan Crawford, dressed as a man, and can claim Frances Ford Coppola as a student during her long tenure at UCLA.

Today on TMC

Two in a row about women who slowly discover their husbands are evil.  I can think of at least three in that category off hand, but these two are completly new to me.  Undercurrent. Starring Kate Hepburn and Robert Taylor, and The Two Mrs. Carrolls. Starring Barbara Stanwyck and Humphrey Bogart. Both are the most unlikely of films, with truly bizarre casting.  If you had told me that I would be watching Humphrey Bogart playing an artist in London who is trying to poison hs second wife, played by Barbara Stanwyck I just never would have believed you. Likewise Kate all skittish and insecure as wife of Robert Taylor. 

When I stumble on to either Barbara, Humphrey or Kate, it is only a matter of time to say the name of the movie. But these to really threw me. Completely under the radar. As talented as an actor may be, not all combinations will work.

Check these two out.  And TMC played a ton of Vivien movies last week. I taped The Roman Spring of Mrs. Stone just for her outfits.  I wonder how many Warren Beaty fans have seen that movie. Come to think of it, Kate did something similar set in Venice. Hold on and I'll remember the name of  it.

Please forgive typos.  The keyboard on my iPad hates me.

All My Thank Yous

Hey Amy, what happens if you bend over?

And I want to thank everyone who made it possible for me to get up here and thank everyone who made it possible for me to get up here and thank everyone who made it possible for me to thank everyone ... except the ones I forgot ...

Honestly, I have no idea why I sat through it. Last night I only caught bits and pieces. I should have left it at that. But this morning I sat down intending to just catch the Fey/Poehler intro, and much to my dismay stuck around for all the stuff I missed. Now I am wondering why I let all that vacuousness suck up so much valuable brain time. What did I learn? Well, a lot of people I think are great were of course "just happy to be nominated." And really you should be. Top five is great, and it is pretty arbitrary from there.

So, leaving aside talent, popularity, who you know, and being in the right place at the right time, let's get down to what really counts. Your fashion choices. Because if you didn't choose your dress yourself, then you chose the stylist who chose your dress, or you chose the publicist who chose your stylist, etc. Either way it come down to you. To your judgement. To the picture of yourself you present to the world. Personally, I think the more flesh you show the more insecure you are. Just relax and be sexy. Don't embarrass yourself by looking like you are trying too hard.

A lovely woman. An unfortunate choice.

I know it isn't fair. The men don't get too wild in the tuxedo variations. How shocking can a purple tie ever be? What if we switched it up one year? What if all the women wore more or less the same suit, and all the men had to parade themselves around trying to outdo each other in sexiness? Let's just close our eyes and imagine that for a while.

What are the clothing categories this year? Well, there is the Not Enough Coverage award—also known as Go Home and Put Some Clothes On. A subcategory of this is the William Ware Theiss Award for costume Most Likely to Malfunction.

Then we have the Mermaid, the Naked and Sparkly, the What Were You Thinking?, the I Know I'm Not Hot and I Just Want to Not Look Ridiculous. And let's not leave out the woman over 40 who knows how to look Elegant. Helen Mirren inspires me every year.

The most eye-catching trend this year would have to be the deep plunge. It is a narrow plunge, not a wide off the shoulder thing. This year's plunge requires a 1/3 to 3/4 view of perfectly rounded neat little orbs. Motionless orbs. Not a lot of jiggle last night, just a lot of skin. The magic of invisible suspension and glue. In this photo Jessica Chastain wears the plunge du jour. It goes all the way down and on the way reveals some unnaturally perky curves.

A steady trend this year went back to the simple strapless—with widely varying results. The trouble with the strapless is that you are either too thin and the dress is wearing you, or you have a little too much flab squeezing out in front of your armpits. (Debra Messing I'm looking at you.)

While you were asleep you forgot I am the arbiter of good taste. Usually I keep a low profile, but the claws come out in awards season. I'm trying to get some photos, but I'm getting very frustrated.

~~~~06.21.13
I had much more to say here, life interrupted.